The Story of Four Kims

Did I ever tell you the story of when Kim was in grade school and she was so frustrated because there were twelve other Kimberly’s in her class and every time Kim tried to suck up to the teacher answer a question and was called on the twelve other sucker uppers would chime in with their answers?  Yeah, I was an angry fifth grader, geography was so my thing. 

Well, one day I took a stand and told my teacher that I wanted to forever be referred to by my middle name which no one else had and was exotic and very hippyish lasted for about two weeks during which Kimberly S., the evil whoreish brown haired future cheerleader would remark that Rheana wasn’t my real name. 

Kim S. I will find you on facebook and not friend you, so there, revenge will be mine!!

Anywho, my mother got a progress report in the mail which stated that Rheana was doing well in school, in which my mother was utterly confused and said KIMBERLY!!!!   Alas, middle name as first name died in a fiery ball of a mother’s fury.

12 years later I am faced with the same thing, only the shortened version.  There are in fact three other Kims in the class, and one teacher named Kim.  The other instructors started calling us Kim and then the initial of our last name, but that also got confusing since two of us Kims have the same initials and really just too much energy to expend.

So that is when I became Dialysis Kim, which neither makes me happy nor brings a smile to my cold, hard face.  This especially makes me agitated when the otherKims get names like Bodacious Kim, Kim who wears heels to class, and Kim the runner, I could be, I dunno, Kim who walks at a normal pace, or, Kim who doesn’t wear a jacket because she still thinks she’s in California. I don’t think that’s a mouth full at all, do you? 

So, the four Kim’s got together and decided we’re gunna start a gang and call ourselves the Kims, or more hippish a all girl punk rock bank also called The Kims, perhaps both, we haven’t really decided yet, but we do have a gang sign already and synced all of our iPods, so we are totally set.


~ by Kim on October 6, 2008.

7 Responses to “The Story of Four Kims”

  1. Kim, indeed, is a very common name. ‘funny how you retell the stories. 😉

  2. I feel you pain it seems everyone has my first or middle name some days.

    You could be California Kim? Like California Barbie?

  3. Wardbunny – one of the other Kim’s is from California too and she’s blonder, skinnier and tanner then me, although not for long…lol

  4. First of all, California Kim works. Nice alliteration. 🙂

    But Dialysis Kim is nothing to shrug off. I give major props to anyone who works Dialysis. I’m a fan. Truly.

    Dialysis Kim is hardcore.

  5. Okay Epi, that is my favorite comment ever!

    “Dialysis Kim is hardcore.”

  6. Hahahaha! Great story! Sorry, though. Umm… were you kidding about 12? That would probably be every girl in the class. Um, unless you had insanely big classes like 400 kids to one teacher.

  7. When I was in typing class in middle school there were seven Stacy’s in the class.

    I was the only guy.

    Many of their parents didn’t realize that “Stacy” is the male spelling and every other derivative is female, which frustrated me to no end.

    Now when I go to the monthly Stacy meetings, it’s 99% women.

    I wouldn’t mind, but they all treat me like their little brother.


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